Friday, March 09, 2007

History... Teaches Everything

Just read this on James Lileks' site, and it goes a long way towards articulating the way I've been feeling the last few years...

I drove home listening to Bob Davis on KSTP; he was revisiting one of his favorite topics, one that mirrors exactly something I’ve felt for some time: the lack of any prominent cultural direction, and the strange incoherent sense of anticipation that lack produces. It’s as if the culture is treading water, with nothing truly new to give it focus and purpose. That’s not exactly a good thing when you’re competing with cultures that have both, in large quantities, and a sense of historical momentum the West has lost. I grapple with this from time to time, usually in the morning; it’s the odd suspicion that the West is exhausted. Not done or over or dead or resigned, but simply exhausted. We live in the end stages of the application of the Enlightenment, at least as applied to our own culture; what now? If you’ve ended debate on the great issues, you’re left with smaller ones, like 720 vs. 1080i; you concern yourself with indistinct dreads and assign to them a moral component; you luxuriate in the hot springs of partisan politics and redefine the issues so the gap between left and right looks like Gog v. Magog territory.

We're due for a societal upheaval, based on the rise and fall of world history - some catastrophic event, some crucible like the French Revolution or the Great Depression/WWII to remake our flabby, selfish, bored society. We're due for a revolution; what shape or form it will take I cannot guess, although terrorism looks to be a likely player. I almost wish it would hurry up and be done soon... I'm tired of such abject cynicism. It's an ugly world and I'd like for some sense of hope or joy to return. (Why do I think this? Read The Fourth Turning by Strauss & Howe. Plus my beloved Dean Simmons and my history degree. I think about this stuff a lot.)

In a related topic: I've been re-watching the
A History of Britain series, written & hosted by Simon Schama, and reading History in English Words by Owen Barfield, and had an epiphany. England has been overrun by various conquering societies so many times that the actual "Britains" are long, long gone. Romans, Scots, Picts, Goths, Visigoths, Vandals, Vikings, Saxons, Normans, and various others. They come in, they steal and/or settle, and a hundred years later another group does the same thing.

But is modern British society upset about it? No, it's pretty much been forgotten. No-one knows where they're from beyond a few hundred years; they have no real clue if they are Saxon or Celt; the historical memory has pretty much been diluted. So nobody's angry at the descendants of the invading Normans for having taken away their properties and rights ("The Normans are keeping us down!"); after all, they as Saxons had done the same thing themselves to the Angles, and so forth and so on. Slavery? pretty much everywhere. Your village got raided by the Invading Group du Jour, you were captured and sold into slavery.

So what might this mean for America? To me, it means that someday the sins of our forefathers will no longer be applied to us. In the far distant future, the dreadful years of slavery and the white man's theft of this land will simply be a fact of history, and not an ever-present reality. I'm not saying we'll forget or it will diminish in the force of its horrors, but new things will happen, and old crimes will slowly recede into the background of history. We're still so young; everything is still so fresh. Give it 500-1000 years, and we'll have new prejudices and new outrages to be angry/guilty about.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Smartypants

You know how there's always one person in your life you feel you can never surprise or impress? I just had one of those rare, delightful moments where I actually succeeded.

I was listening to CNN for about a minute in the kitchen at Elder Brother's company, NetCentral (the web design job I do once each month) and they said that the Dow had just plummeted over 300 points. So I walk past my brother Cy and his business partner Craig's offices and casually say "The stock market just dropped 300" and kept walking, at which point I was called back and asked for more details. I was able to confirm that it was a result of the activity in China overnight, and suggested that Greenspan's comments on the economy yesterday probably hadn't helped (also offering that he was making reference to Bernanke's recent comments).

18 months ago? I would not have known who Greenspan or Bernanke were. Thanks, American Economic Association! But the really great thing is that I knew something Cy didn't. For a change.

Aid and Comfort

I love this picture.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Call to Arms

[speedy recap: Eric Volz, son of my friend Maggie Anthony, has been tried and falsely convicted of the murder of his ex-girlfriend in Nicaragua. There are multiple eyewitness accounts of his whereabouts at the time of the murder as well as phone records, and no legitimate evidence was presented at his trial. The people of Nicaragua have been completely lied to by the press and the victim's mother, and their misguided hatred of Eric has turned them into a lynch mob on several occasions. His life is in great danger in prison. He's been sentenced to 30 years, but an appeal is in process.]

I contacted Eric Volz' dad last week to ask him if it's ok to try and bring Eric's situation to the attention of US media. He said to go ahead - initially they were reluctant to contact the media for fear of negative press that might anger the Nicaraguan people... but now Eric's life in prison is so perilous that it couldn't get worse.

So I appeal to all readers of this blog - if you know someone, anyone in the American media, please contact them and ask them to look into this story. The main website has specific details of all facts of the case (which have been almost completely overlooked in the handful of actual news stories on the case in the US) and the family is more than happy to share all information, affidavits, etc. proving his innocence.

Injustice in any form is the most horrible thing in the world to me - I can deal with terminal illness, and random violence... but the deliberate, politically motivated crucifixion of an innocent man whose only crime is that he is American, troubles and depresses me like nothing else. Please, contact your elected representatives, local media... anyone who is in a position to do something about this.

Monday, February 19, 2007

The crisis continues...

There's no news on Eric as of today; I did read a blog that said he'd been returned to prison. God help him.

What troubles me is that in the 3 actual news stories about Eric (The Tennessean, Nashville City Paper, and Time magazine), they made a negligible effort to present any of the plethora of facts about his alibi on the day of the murder! I cannot understand, with the media's delight in dramatic stories, why they haven't snapped this up?! Why are none of the media outlets reporting on this?! With the 24 hour cable news cycle, you'd think they'd spend some time on a story about an American being falsely charged.

I'm very frustrated.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Dreadful News

From Eric Volz's family:

Trial Update

With the heaviest heart we inform everyone that the judge just pronounced Eric “guilty”. We are in a state of total shock and disbelief. It is incomprehensible that we find ourselves dealing with what may come next.

Our understanding from the Embassy is that Eric will be remanded back into the penitentiary system. We are, as we were before, extremely, extremely worried about his safety.

Please contact your Congresspersons immediately!!!

Go to the Friends of Eric web site to “Congressional Contact” to find the link to your Congressman as soon as possible to register your outrage at this judgment.

The prosecution presented no evidence that Eric is any way connected to, or guilty, of this crime. We strongly believe this may be a politically-based decision.

www.friendsofericvolz.com

Thank you for your prayers and hope – the vigil continues.

Eric’s family

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Those Things That Bring The Happy

You know, it's interesting how very small things can be enough to help get you out of The Sad. I have decided to refer to them as Bringing The Happy. Monday morning are hard for me; not because they are, essentially, Mondays and the beginning of the workweek, but because they are the necessity of re-entering the question of How Will I Live My Life.

Am I too sloppy?
Do I have too much stuff?
Am I supposed to keep working with computers, or am I supposed to be doing something else?
Am I working hard enough?
Is there really anything I can do to lose weight? Or is it pretty much a genetic curse?
Could I be saving more of my income?
Am I taking the easy way out of life and relationships?
Am I taking enough risks?

Understandably, this makes Mondays hard, since I tend to give myself a break from self-doubt over the weekend. So I rely on those small things that Bring The Happy to keep me from getting depressed. Here are two of them:

CuteOverload.com. I cannot overemphasize the power of this site to make my life a little better. Pictures of cute fuzzy animals are very therapeutic; the next best thing, of course, being swarmed over by an actual herd of bunnies, puppies, and kittens. But they are not always available for swarming.

The Polyjesters. I just found them by accident on a streaming folk music radio station, and their bouncy, eclectic, loungy, nostalgic music is a tonic. They're my new favorite band; I just go to their site and the Happy music pours out.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Eric's trial begins...

taken directly from friendsofericvolz.com:


February 13, 2007
Today is the 84th day since Eric’s arrest, and the night before the long awaited trial.

Eric reported to us this evening that at the Pre-Trial Hearing the judge ruled that the trial would indeed take place. We were glad to hear from him that none of the key evidence for his defense was eliminated for use in the trial. The judge did eliminate several witnesses for the prosecution for reasons of irrelevance or redundancy.

Eric’s trial begins early Wednesday morning – 9a.m. (Central time) in Rivas, Nicaragua. This is the site of the mob scene in early December after his initial hearing. Due to the threats on Eric’s life over the course of this ordeal, we are very, very concerned about security.

The trial will take place over 3 days: ½ days on Wednesday & Thursday, and a full day Friday. This is a trial by judge (no jury). The judge will provide her ruling at the end of the day on Friday. One specific concern 3 days of trial creates is the 3 round trips in and out of Rivas that Eric and his witnesses will have to make. The logistics involved in this are immense and full of unknowns!

Specific prayer requests:

  • Safety of all involved in and surrounding the trial: Eric, witnesses, press, attorneys, bystanders, security, police
  • Health of one of Eric’s key defense team who is sick with the flu
  • Judge
  • Doris’ mother & family
  • That the trial is swift and that Eric will be free on Friday!

As you can imagine, my heart is in my throat!

Monday, February 12, 2007

Various and Sundry

Eric Volz's trial has been reset for the 3rd time; it's due to start tomorrow. Please pray for the safety of everyone involved, and that the victim's mom will not persist in spreading lies! I am hopinghopinghoping for an immediate acquittal. I'm hoping that next time I visit friendsofericvolz.com, the Updates page will say he is on a plane back to the States!

I'm melancholy today; I need to hang out with friends! Too much time alone lately.

I finally started a 3 day dietetic fast, as prescribed by my fantastic nutritionist, TI Bishop (
breathoflifeonline.com) I've been putting it off for a few weeks now, because I am scared I'll get sick or pass out. It's perfectly healthy - I'm taking all sorts of supplements and vile-tasting liquids - but I'm still scared that I'll pass out. See, despite all medical tests to the contrary, I think I'm hypoglycemic because I used to pass out a lot when I was young, and I can get light-headed if I wait too long to eat. So as you can imagine, I make a point of never skipping a meal if I can possibly help it! My dread of fainting is really strong. But I need a jump-start to lose some weight, so I'm trying to push on through my fear.

I think I had a window to skip out of town for a vacation last week and I missed it. Damn.

Valentine's Day is coming up, and despite my determination to not let it effect me, the sadness pokes me at every commercial, every sight of a shelf of heart-shaped chocolates. Valentine's Day sucks in all the obvious ways, because despite all the self-confidence in the world, you feel like a failure if you have no one to love or be loved by at this time. It's one of those percentage points in the 95/5 Theory I have developed. (If you're single, you're happy with your solitary state 95% of the time. The other 5% covers such miseries as car trouble, big bugs to be squished, weddings of much younger women, and Valentine's Day.)

Friday, February 09, 2007

Delicious!

Just read, by way of John Hodgman, the best smack-down on TV chefs by Anthony Bourdain... highly recommended!

Rachel Ray: Complain all you want. It’s like railing against the pounding surf. She only grows stronger and more powerful. Her ear-shattering tones louder and louder. We KNOW she can’t cook. She shrewdly tells us so. So...what is she selling us? Really? She’s selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough. She’s a friendly, familiar face who appears regularly on our screens to tell us that “Even your dumb, lazy ass can cook this!” Wallowing in your own crapulence on your Cheeto-littered couch you watch her and think, “Hell…I could do that. I ain’t gonna…but I could--if I wanted! Now where’s my damn jug a Diet Pepsi?” Where the saintly Julia Child sought to raise expectations, to enlighten us, make us better--teach us--and in fact, did, Rachael uses her strange and terrible powers to narcotize her public with her hypnotic mantra of Yummo and Evoo and Sammys. “You’re doing just fine. You don’t even have to chop an onion--you can buy it already chopped. Aspire to nothing…Just sit there. Have another Triscuit…Sleep….sleep….”

Tee hee!

Monday, January 29, 2007

Words, words, words

I am in the midst of a descriptive debate with a friend (whose identity I shall conceal since Lo, She Findeth Blogging Offensive...) over descriptive superlatives for attractive individuals. I am quite smitten with the qualities of Christopher Eccleston, and commented to her that I'm delighted that he is now on Heroes since I can no longer enjoy him on Doctor Who (One season?! Who does only one season?!)


She agreed and called him "hot" which bothered me excessively. "Hot" is what you call the buffed and brainless, not a genuine talent with an attractive personality that radiates through their skin. She took exception to this, saying that "Hot" is whatever you want it to mean in terms of attractiveness; she also prefers the brainy and personable over the brainless and built and so if she finds Eccleston "hot", then he is.

But the description is overused! I complained. It's commonplace - Paris Hilton uses it - it has no value. I suggested the more refined and complimentary descriptive of "Ambrosial," derived from ambrosia: food of the gods.

for example: "Christopher Eccleston is positively ambrosial in his new role on Heroes." (He's the one with the beard, BTW)

I suspect she will further contest the issue with me via email; but it got me to thinking about the dilution of other words. In the last week I've been thinking (as I have many times before) how we say "I love such-and-such" and how "love" has essentially lost the punch of any real meaning. Same with "awesome" - if something truly is Awe-some, it would knock us down. But when you use it to describe a pair of shoes... well, it's pretty much lost it's original meaning.

But as a result of the devaluation of certain words like love and awesome, lesser words have gained greater weight. Someone said the other day that they really "liked" me, and I found that a compliment of no mean order! To be liked means more to me than to be loved... isn't that odd?!

I should say, I'm not really bothered that words like "love" and "awesome" don't mean the same thing anymore - language is perpetually mutating, and societies will always come up with other words to communicate deep and important feelings. The Japanese language didn't have a word for love in the sense of modern, Western ideals of love until the 20th century; the best they could do prior to that was ai, which actually meant "duty"! Now they have some other words that get the job done, or they use the English "love". Words never stop changing, until they die from disuse and are fossilized in the OED.

Friday, January 26, 2007

I've Noticed...

One of the things I noticed in late December and early January, is that one of the greatest pleasures of the holiday has become the opportunity to complain about the holiday. Seriously - when I'm with various FriendClusters, the liveliest discussions always end up being about disappointing or dreadful Christmases!

Which in itself is a good thing, because while it's happening, we can tell ourselves, "this will make an AWESOME story!" Friend Jen has regaled several different groups with tales of her disastrous family Christmas, and has essentially won the award for Conflicted Family Ideas of What Christmas Will Be This Year.

So tell me your story! I would dearly love to hear it!

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Where I Am

Sorry I haven't posted much lately... I've been living in Stressville, at the corner of Work and Weariness. It tends to redirect your attention elsewhere.

Plus, any writing I've been doing has been for the benefit of Eric Volz, who is being unjustly held in Nicaraguan prison on false charges. I try and write him every other day or so, since letters are what's keeping him going right now. I can't even conceive of what it must be like down there, and I don't think I really want to know. The best I can do right now is pray without ceasing and write lots and lots of letters.

There's a concert to raise money for his legal defense on Wednesday the 24th - you can read more about it on the site.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Bollywood Blowup

As regular readers know, I love Stephen Colbert... well, he just did a bit on Celebrity Feuds (Trump & Rosie, obviously!) but the last section was about some of MY favorite actors, and so it was funny on so many levels...


Thursday, January 04, 2007

The New Year

This rather accurately depicts my emotions around January 1st:

Friday, December 29, 2006

Python Plush!

OK, how much do I PINE to own this utterly worthless (but hi-LAR-ious) stuff...?!?!

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Martha Stewart Meltdown

So Christmas is finally done... relatively speaking. From the day after Thanksgiving, I have been in an unconscious race to Achieve Holiday Social Perfection, and had almost accomplished it, until I collapsed on Christmas Eve.

I can't even begin to ennumerate all the stuff I did in the last month... but you know I'm gonna try!

  • writing, designing, printing, addressing, and mailing over 100 Christmas cards
  • celebrating my 38th birthday several times (I'm grateful, really!)
  • getting all the presents for family and friends
  • social events or rehearsals every night
  • MULTIPLE church choir & music performances
  • party food preparation
  • more church music
  • more social events
Not to forget, I also started a short-term project for my brother Cy's company, so I took on more work while maintaining my regular clients. I think I worked every Saturday in December!

So, Christmas Eve arrives; I get up at 6 am to sing at both services, and after my favorite Sunday lunch over Entertainment Weekly at the Logan's bar with my friend Pam the bartender, I head home for a nice nap, before baking cookies for the family buffet the next day, a potluck around 6 pm with my Sunday Supper Club at the Landers', and another performance with the Choir at the 10 pm service that night. I am congratulating myself on the drive home for having arrived at the big day without any emotional angst, and for having accomplished all my Holiday goals. I should mention, I am not aware of ever having made any conscious decision to do all this... it just sortof happened.

I sleep for an hour or so, awake exhausted, and promptly dissolve into a panic attack. After crying off and on for a half-hour, I feel somewhat better, but still overwhelmed by what I have left to accomplish. I call to excuse myself from the potluck with friends, which I hated doing but was absolutely necessary to regain sanity. I bake no cookies. I lie, squashed, on the sofa and watch The Return of the King, and pretend that I won't do the 10 pm service, despite the fact that I know I will have to go, since we are short on altos, and there's a special Canticorum piece to be done which I am really necessary for.

By the time I leave for a run-through at 9 pm, I'm able to function, but find myself petulant, whiny, and ill-inclined to have any reverence for the significance of the service whatsoever. It turns out that I am even more necessary than I thought, since 2 of the 4 Canticorum altos are absent and I must immediately learn the 1st alto part. I do not completely manage to do so, but the illusion is maintained.

I am also pressed into service to be one of the 3 miked singers for the service music, which I actually enjoy since it was with my friend Rebecca who is a marvelous soprano. Singing with her always feels like a reward for good behavior. Not that my behavior this evening will be good...

I get through the 3 hours of run-through and service, although at one point I seem to recollect that during the full choir & congregation Carol Singing, I sang the words "Thi-is is, the song, tha-at ne-ver will end..." during "The First Nowell" (It felt like there were a dozen verses! Honestly!) I am also a little punchy on the mikes, and I believe I threatened David before we sang the Lord's Prayer, saying that I OWNED the harmonies on this song, so he'd better not sing what I was singing.

We finish up at full blast, and I go home in punch-drunk euphoria, and sleep for 9 hours. On Christmas Day, I am able to resume all of my baking responsibilities and manage to make everything I had planned for the family Christmas that night. Orange Spice Shortbread with Orange Glaze and Almonds, Tuxedo Cheesecake Bars, and Raspberry Popcorn Balls for the kids.

So it's pretty much all done... and I am in emotional flux since I haven't taken 5 minutes to deal with the fact that it's the end of another year, which always shakes me up a bit (Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing? Have I accomplished anything worthwhile this year? Am I supposed to go help refugees in the Sudan?) Plus my allergies are acting up, and I ate enough sweets and junk this month to send me into a diabetic coma.

Have I mentioned that I'm going to Chicago most of next week to work for the AEA during their yearly conference? No?

I need a vacation.

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Something to cheer you up...

Just came across this again; it's a bit outdated, but the dull ones make the funny ones, funnier.

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on "THIS" side of the road before it goes after the problem on the "OTHER SIDE" of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his "CURRENT" problems before adding "NEW" problems.

OPRAH: Well I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DONALD RUMSFELD: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

ANDERSON COOPER/CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am for it now, and will remain against it.

JUDGE JUDY: That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level.

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain. Alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's why they call it the "other side". Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that!

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in peace.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2006, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken. The platform is much more stable and will never cra..#?&&^ (C\..... reboot.)

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

Monday, December 18, 2006

Travesty of Justice

This upsets me so much I can barely breathe...

There is a very unjust situation going on right now involving my friends Dane and Maggie Anthony – Eric, Maggie's son (Dane's stepson), is currently jailed in Nicaragua on murder charges - the victim was Eric's ex-girlfriend. 2 other suspects confessed to the crime, but were released, and Eric wasn't even in town when it happened, and had 10 witnesses vouch for his whereabouts when the crime occurred... but he is still being held. In addition, lynch mobs have been whipped up in the area, and several times Eric has been deliberately put in danger from the mobs. This is obviously a deliberate attempt to frame him... please pray HARD for his safety and that justice will be done!

You can find more information here:
FriendsofEricVolz.com

It's baaaaaaack!

Can you believe it? Another skunk bomb went off early this morning! I woke up at 5:30 and went "Again...?!?!"

Fortunately, I had remembered a wonderful odor-removing candle someone had given me last Christmas. The thing really does work - within 2 hours, the smell was completely gone!


I really don't know what to do about this - I'm scared to investigate, since I might actually come across a skunk and scare them into spraying me.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Not To Be Found Anywhere!

OK, I have a challenge. Like the cookbook one.

I am trying to find a poster of a watercolor "preliminary sketch" from an Japanese anime movie, Tonari no Totoro, or, "My Neighbor Totoro," by Haayo Miyazaki. I actually own a copy of it - I bought it almost 18 years ago when I was in Japan. But I'd like to get a couple of copies of it for friends.

Unfortunately, it appears to be out of print. I have looked EVERYWHERE on the internet with no luck. There's a ton of stuff from the movie available, like stuffed animals, screen shot posters, etc. But this specific poster? Nowhere to be found!

It's a prized posession of mine, and really lovely - an early, sketchy watercolor of the smallest girl, Mei, with the 2 smaller Totoro critters in pale greens and golds. With the flood of items available from the movie, I'm amazed that this one has disappeared from circulation!

Stinky

So it's been rawther warmish in Nashville for the last week or so; it'll be hitting 70 for a few days to come. Quite obscene for December, don't you think? So last night I switched back on the AC.

Anyway, around 4 am, I awoke to a putrid odor... apparently a skunk had let one off in the area. This is not unusual; I live on a heavily wooded hilltop, and it's fairly common to get out of your car at the mailboxes and almost pass out from the stink. You see (and smell) them as smears on the road all over Williamson County.

But this was the first time I had smelt one in my apartment. I don't know how it had gotten into the AC, but it was pretty strong. I lit a scented candle in my room and eventually went back to sleep. But when I woke up, it was still stinky - stupid candle was useless. Eventually I got used to the smell, and didn't even notice it anymore; perhaps your sense of smell shuts itself down as a protective measure.

When I left this morning, there was no smell in the area... apparently it was just my apartment! I dread going home... there's no good air circulation since the windows are crappy.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Rules of Regifting

Look, we need to accept the fact that Re-Gifting is an accepted part of modern society. Whether anyone admits it or not, we almost all do it. And really, I think it's a good thing, and not at all hurtful or inconsiderate when done carefully... but there are some guidelines to follow.

First I want to justify WHY regifting is a good idea:

  1. It gets rid of STUFF. If you have a cabinet or closet full of items that have no useful place in your home, they can be made useful by giving them to someone who CAN use them. We live in a society that has more unnecessary junk than any time in history... Regifting is Recycling in its highest form.
  2. It saves money. If you need to buy a $10-20 gift for someone, don't have a good idea of what to give them, and there's a lovely tchotchke in your closet that you know they would like, where's the virtue in going and spending money on a (presumably) FRESH tchotchke to give them?
  3. For CLOSE friends and family who get upset when you spend money on a present for them, regifting becomes a sort of fun cadeau challenge - finding something truly appropriate for someone, yet letting them know it was inexpensive or a freebie so they won't get upset that you spent money. Regifting works well in this context.

Now that's I've cleverly persuaded you of the validity of regifting, here are some rules to follow, since there is risk involved:

  1. If you don't remember where a gift came from, then be VERY CAREFUL where you regift it. Nothing is ruder or more appalling than giving it to the original Giver, or someone who was around when you initially received it. This should be obvious!
  2. Personalized gifts are ineligible for regifting - books with notes written on the endpapers, notecards with your name embossed, monogrammed stuff.
  3. Rewrap the item, or re-giftbag it. Overly-crumpled tissue paper is a dead giveaway that this gift has been "around the block." I used to get regifted items all the time from a co-worker, and they were perfectly nice... but for some of them, it was pretty obvious that they'd been sitting in reserve for a while!
  4. Be particularly watchful for pricetags and aged price stickers - if the pricetag has been on the bottom of an item for so long that the glue has started to deteriorate, or it was poorly removed and the remaining glue has gotten grimy, it's a good giveaway that the item's been in rotation.
  5. If you suspect that a gift you have received has been regifted more than once, it needs to stop with you. Gifts that are continually passed on begin to acquire an Aura of Failure. It needs to be taken out of the rotation, lest it arrive back in the hands of the intial giver by mistake! Give it to Goodwill or AmVets. Stop the cycle.

Recommended regifting ideas:

  1. Candles. Always useful, neutral, safe
  2. Picture Frames. Ditto
  3. Certain books - duplicates of books already on your shelves in particular, or ones that are humorous or seasonal.
  4. Christmas ornaments.
  5. Scented soaps, fancy lotions, "gourmet" toiletries.
  6. Gourmet foods, such as biscotti, olive oil, fancy coffee, European jams & jellies.
  7. Blank books and journals.
  8. Anything from the HomeGoods section of TJ Maxx.

Gifts to avoid regifting:

  1. Mugs. These need to be taken out of the gift-giving business alltogether. They are acceptible in rare occasions when filled with, say, diamonds. Or Krugerrands.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Ha!

Beautiful little bit of computer comedy!

Christmas 2006

I know, I know - not any real journal entries here of late. Bin busy. And if I have a quickie idea, I put it on my blog. But here's my 2006 Christmas Card, complete with adorable niece picture (Emma) and Way Too Much Information About Me. Enjoy. If possible.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

All I Want For Christmas...

... is for Bobby Kennedy not to have died in 1968, the (tragic) year of my birth. I want him to have beaten Nixon, and therefore Watergate and everything it stands for wouldn't even exist.

... is for government officials to start being bluntly honest about EVERYTHING. No prevaricating, no spinning, just the facts.

... is for a Gandhi or Martin Luther King Jr. to arise in the Middle East, and change the way they think about the world. Because nothing else will ever work.

... is to get a full-time job that has good benefits, enjoyable work, and variety.

... is to win just enough money in some lottery or windfall to pay my debts, student loans, family loans, and $5-10K for downpayment on an affordable, safe condo. And enough to pay off my car loan so I can chuck the damn thing for a Civic.

... is to find out what I'm supposed to be doing with my life.

Believe me, I'm going to be adding to this list.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Deliberate Tackiness

A friend of mine was talking at dinner Monday night about how she needed to find the tackiest, most awful Christmas sweatshirt or sweater for a Christmas party contest... granted, SHE was the hostess, and contest was her idea, but her competitive nature was such that she really wanted to win the prize she had bought as an award!

Well, I immediately got inspired. There's just SOOOO much you can do with the massive quantities of stuff available to decorate with in December... Jo-Ann's Etc. Craft Store is just lousy with junk! So I begged to be allowed to make her a new sweatshirt, and she said "I'll pay anything. Cost is no object," or words to that effect.

I started with a mustard-green, long-sleeve t-shirt... I was afraid with the quantities of stuff I was thinking of tacking onto it, that it would get really hot. I was almost paralyzed by the sheer volume of choices available to me, but finally decided on using those cheap red velvet bows you put on wreaths as the primary decoration. My "theme", if you will.

I started by hot-gluing small bows on each sleeve.

I had also purchased a bunch of the most appalling glittery Christmas picks - you know, the little cluster decorations you spike into centerpieces and wreaths. But upon closer examination, they were too bulky and difficult to attach to the t-shirt, so I eventually returned them. But in the meantime, I wanted to get some more work done on the shirt until I could get more junk, so I started stamping gold paint snowflakes on the front, and putting dots of puffy glitter-paint on the edges.

I discovered to my dismay that this was actually quite pretty. It's a lot harder than you might think to achieve deliberate ugliness; my natural instinct on a craft project like this would be "what would look pretty?" I had obviously had a little too much rum & diet Coke which had impaired my judgment, and had fallen back into Pretty mode.

I let the paint dry overnight, and went back to Jo-Ann's (which, BTW, is ALREADY selling Christmas decorations at 50% off. And is beginning to shift them back from the front of the store to sale racks. And there is a shelf or two of VALENTINE'S DAY stuff. Sheesh.) and bought some more junk.

I sewed a band of tinsel garland around the neck, which did a lot to dilute the effect of the pretty gold snowflakes.

I then sewed on three large, thick red felt snowflakes under that, and glued two big puffy red bows on top of each shoulder. I swirled some of the puffy glitter paint in red and gold around each wristband.

I had some jingle bells that I had intended to sew onto the sleeves between each bow, but ran out of time.

The crowning accessory to the ensemble was the addition of a HUGE red velvet bow. I had initially intended that it should be on the front of the shirt, but the thing was so enormous and heavy that the shirt would have sagged badly. So I took the ribbon along and told her to wear it around her waist attached to a belt, so the bow would sit like a bustle in the back.


I also took 2 garish silk poinsettias and sewed them to barrettes. You know, for her hair! And I took along 2 little white birds on clips, and told her to attach them on the big-ass bow.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Gen-X Christmas Letter

Christmas, 2006
Dear Friends and Family,

It's been a busy year for the gang, and we're so proud of each and every one of our accomplishments in the last 12 months... so let's just dive right into all the good news!

You'll recognize Lola in her trademark feather boa... as she finishes the final year of her doctorate at Vanderbilt in Medieval Philosophy, she is contemplating not one, but SEVEN teaching offers at various institutions from Sydney to Mozambique to Seattle. We're hoping she takes the one in Paris so she can finally marry her current amour, the fabulously wealthy divorcee with the famous parfum line!

Armundo is happily re-ensconced in his hometown of Lisbon, but we were all sorry to see him go... after so many years in Nashville setting up various bank security systems, he finally decided that it was time to go back home and accept his responsibility of running the family llama business. He has promised many shipments of top-quality alpaca to Susan in return for scarves, blankets, and other crocheted tchotchkes.

And Pam? Well, Pam is still our little ray of sunshine! After the huge success of her first book,
The World is a Beautiful Place and Everyone Just Needs to Shut Up and Enjoy It, a whirlwind book signing tour of the US and Canada has left her quite fatigued but exhilarated. Plans are already underway for similar promotional tours in England, Ireland, Dubai and New Zealand. And her next book? Silly! I'm not allowed to say a word about it!

As for myself, the simple comforts of home are still my greatest joy. Strolling through the halls of my enormous rustic farmhouse in Leiper's Fork, the staff barely have to make an effort to scurry out of my sight, since it was built with many cleverly concealed alcoves to duck into. So I still have the illusion of privacy! Nicole and Keith Urban are always popping by on their way to Bread & Co. in Green Hills; I do keep telling them that the Starbucks in Cool Springs has better coffee, but they just laugh and say they enjoy the drive! So silly.

Back to Reality

My House Calls Computer Service business has grown steadily in the last year, and although every month is its own little Adventure, called "Will Susan Make The Rent?" I feel like I'm making progress. I'm still working part-time at the American Economic Association on the Vanderbilt University campus. My AEA bosses have been amazingly flexible with my schedule, which I'm very grateful for, and I quite enjoy my time there. I have some more website design clients now as well, so I feel like my work is full of my favorite word - VARIETY. I think I've doubled my computer knowledge in the last 12 months!

The nieces and nephews of many a previous Christmas letter are growing steadily - Elliott the oldest has become a teenager this year (NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!) and the rest are becoming more and more mature and interesting every month. My Knoxville Nieces Taylor, Maddie & Ginny (Woggy) are no longer terrified of me, which is a definite improvement and I only wish they were here in Nashville so I could see them every week too. I babysit my local babies El, George & Henry and Emma almost every Saturday which is one of the highlights of my week, despite the fact that I feel like I'm constantly saying "No, you can't," the entire night. As you can imagine, I am a continual disappointment to them. (No more dessert pizza for you!)

This has been the Year of The Accursed Car, which has been more than a little frustrating. I found that red cars are indeed a BAD IDEA for 2 main reasons:
1) They are statistically more likely to be pulled over for speeding, and
2) They are statistically more likely to be in accidents. (Really! the guy at the body shop confirmed it!)
Granted, when I was in my little white Civic, I did have to replace the front hood three times from my apparent invisibility to 2 large trucks backing up and a careless deer, but three different incidents in one year (both sides and rear bumper)? That's a red car for you. Of course, I also attribute my problems to the fact that it is a Toyota Corolla and not a Honda as I would wish. From the minute my roof got dented & dinged by ACORNS while on my first vacation after purchasing it, I have been ill-disposed towards my car. So, useful lesson from this? Avoid red vehicles.

Susan's Picks for 2006

TV: Doctor Who, Heroes and Eureka. Let your geek flag fly! Three series that would be classified as Sci-Fi/Fantasy, but transcend the genre. The top of the heap? Doctor Who, definitely. Writing, acting, plot, you name it, I love it. The Brits really do know how to make a TV show, especially because they make fewer, and spend more time and money on what they do make. I can't recommend this (newly established in 2005) series highly enough.
Movies: Casino Royale. I used to read the original Ian Fleming novels when I was younger, and this really feels like the books. Not that I didn't enjoy the ones they've made over the last 30 years, but those were silly, fun fluff. Daniel Craig as James Bond is layered, compelling, and BETTER THAN SEAN CONNERY. I mean it.
Books: Dead Bunnies by Bryan Currie. A new Christian writer in the vein of Anne Lamott and Donald Miller, he tells really funny, personal anecdotes and envisions the world and events as part of an amazing Big Picture. Plus, his relatives live in Batesville, AR too!
Music: Songs from the Labyrinth by Sting. The fact that he would spend his fan capital on a collection of renaissance songs by John Dowland is something to be applauded. I really enjoy this kind of music ever since I got to sing madrigals in high school (I like popular songs that you can sing along with; I don't care as much for music that nobody but professionals can perform). Not everyone will like it, and it may be considered a vanity project, but it's definitely worth listening to a few times (not just once; it gets better with repetition).

As I write this on the verge of a very busy month, I hope that all of you, my friends and family, have a wonderful, meaningful Christmas holiday. The Lord bless you and keep you, the Lord make his face to shine upon you, and be gracious unto you – Amen!

Sincerely,

Susan

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Getting It All Done

Why, whywhywhywhy, is life so unevenly distributed? Why must I endure 2.5 months of inactivity, only to be "rewarded" afterwards by unending overload? The number of activities and jobs I'm juggling at present is, of course, a blessing, but I don't feel very blessed. I just feel overwhelmed.

A list, for your perusal:
  1. I turn 38 on Dec. 3rd. No pressure there!
  2. My car continues to be a burden to me. Whilst on my long drive over the river and through the woods to Grandmother's house, the damn engine light went back on. I thought I'd gotten that fixed less than a month ago! So, looks like the catalytic converter may need replacing (as initially suspected) which means a few hundred. Again.
  3. Then, the body work disaster continues. They didn't have it ready for me by the vaguely agreed-upon time last Tuesday, so I took it out before the final detailing... which it needs badly, so I'll be returning it. Plus, one of the back door locks is loose so they need to take the whole damn door apart again to fix it.
  4. Both of these car issues will, of course, necessitate leaving it for an extended period in 2 different shops. Do I have the resources for dealing with these transport snafus? No, I do not.
  5. Next week I have to do the monthly Bookpage.com website, which is apparently a third larger than usual, and needs must be done by Thursday evening.
  6. But I am also wanted for a new part-time job for the month of December that is 20+ hours a week. I want this job, really I do - I need the money badly - but now my schedule is filled without any room for my:
  7. Regular Clients. I have 4 who want my help next week, and I honestly don't know how I'll fit them in with my currently full schedule.
  8. And finally, I am out of money. 2.5 months of reduced work means reduced income, and I have rent and health insurance due in the next 10 days... and there is NO cash coming in during that time except for dribs and drabs from the at-home clients I manage to fit in. I need a minimum of $1000 to appear miraculously in the next week.

I just feel overwhelmed. This is one of the 5% times when I need a spouse to take on some of the burdens! Cause my family? They've given enough, I can't call on them again. Plus the humilation of having to ask for help again is just too much at present, because it will inevitably produce a lecture (an entirely justified lecture, at that) on how I should either a) be saving more for such emergencies, b) get a real full-time job for security, or c) not be so emotionally battered by such slings and arrows.

Needless to say, the lectures don't help. They just make me feel like more of a failure. Which I suppose I am, even though none of them would ever use that word.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Why Won't They Leave Us Alone?!

A friend sent me this article from Wired magazine and I recommend everyone read it – we need to know what's out there, and what malicious developers are capable of.

Attack of the Bots
"The latest threat to the Net: autonomous software programs that combine forces to perpetrate mayhem, fraud, and espionage on a global scale. How one company fought the new Internet mafia – and lost."

The question I have is, if it's so insidious and almost un-winnable a battle, what are our options? The thing I used to say to frustrated users was "get a Mac." It's still the most immune machine out there at present!

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Squeeeee!

My friends Ken & Lisa had their first baby a couple of months back, and Lisa is exCEEDingly fond of Peanuts. When this idea occurred to me, I knew I had to carry it out.

It was harder than it looked; finding a tiny yellow t-shirt for a newborn that looked like the ones worn by Charlie Brown was difficult and I ended up buying it online. Then the zig-zags... I used a twill tape that had to be carefully folded into points, then tacked down (fusible tape) then appliqued on... it took over three hours and I had to start over a couple of times.

But the result was DEFINITELY worth it!

Friday, October 27, 2006

Fame!

OMGOMGOMGOMG!

I'm involved with a tiny tsunami of web popularity! The blog I've been contributing to since its start 7 days ago, Ugly, Ugly, Bollywood Fugly, has been mentioned on one of the main indian culture blogs, and literally DOZENS of people are heading over and reading it and commenting and OMG, this must be what it's like to be Julia Roberts!

I'm worthless for the rest of the afternoon.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

A Good Thing

I've started to read Scott Adams' blog on occasion (creator of Dilbert) and I'm always surprised by what I find there - I mean, you get a certain perception as to what a person is like based on what they do, and the Dilbert comic strip is so cynical... but he's actually a very determined person who makes things like positive thinking and daily affirmations work for him (along with the actual hard work to make things happen...)

Anyway, I just read an amazing entry on his blog; to the effect that, for 18 months, he has been unable to talk. It's a strange disease where you can sometimes sing or (in his case) do public speaking, but ordinary conversation is somehow disconnected. Anyway, he's been dealing with it as well as can be expected... but he says it better than me - take a look.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Run faster!

A client of mine recently asked what I would recommend she look for in a new computer. This is something that you can discuss endlessly, because there's Pros and Cons all over the place!

I would say that for a laptop, I would recommend 1 GB memory (RAM), and at the least an 80 GB hard drive. I would double that for a desktop, simply because you want to plan a bit for the future and it's cheaper than it is for a laptop. The Ghz (speed) should be 1.75 or higher.

If you want to download TV shows & music, the bigger the hard drive, the better!

I don't tend to recommend that people buy the best top end-computers (unless you work for Dell and they give you a new free one every other year!) because the turnover rate on the technology is so fast that you can spend a small fortune on something that will be obsolete or inadequate within 2 years. For example, I just gave a geek friend of mine an 8 MB RAM chip to put on his keychain, and pointed out that it was probably the most expensive doohicky ever hung on a keychain, since it cost $350 when it was made 10 years ago.

So you see my point - mid-range seems to work best, with the understanding that you'll want to replace it in about 3 years. Computers are still so new that people are only now starting to realize that they're not like major appliances like refrigerators or washers; the technology is continually doubling in speed and capacity, and since they're used in conjunction with all the other computers in the world in terms of shared documents and the internet, you really do need to plan for regular replacements.


Plus, the longer you wait to upgrade, the harder it is to rollover you data from an old system to a new one. I was helping a client get Word files off a Mac Performa 6400 a while back, and brough my external drive to back it up... but the Performa doesn't have USB ports. Nor did it have an ethernet port, so I couldn't get it online to transfer files that way.

We have to learn to think about our computers in terms of preserving data and files for future use, and how we'll shift everything from an old system to a new one. Those floppy disks your senior thesis is stored on won't last forever!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Just Ask Susan... (She'll Mouth off About Anything!)

Ok, so it's totally presumptuous to ‘suggest’ a blog topic, but I am sure you could pontificate the matter at hand much better than myself. So I know you live in an apartment (as do I)… do you not just get sick and tired of people telling you you should buy a house? Regardless of my reason (don’t have the $$ to put down a down payment, don’t want to leave the current neighborhood I live in b/c there’s no way in hell I can afford anything in the 37212 zip code, or maybe I just don’t want the responsibility of it all) I find it rather annoying when people say ‘you’re throwing money away’. Well, no, I’m not because I have a roof over my head, hot water, and a refrigerator that I didn’t have to purchase. But I’m not bitter… :-) can you tell what the topic has been around the office today? I’ve just been on the periphery of the conversation but I’m still annoyed. :( what are your thoughts? -- Allison


You know, maybe it's because I'm old and been renting for what seems forever, but I wish I could own a house and be building equity... but I can't afford to. On the other hand, I can well recognize the myriad advantages of renting, and maybe you just need to be all kick-ass and fling these around like throwing stars when the conversation comes up again:

1) I don't have to do lawn care.
BUT You have to own/rent a lawnmower, or pay for someone else to do it... must buy grass care products, plants, shrubs, gardening tools, etc. You have to WEED.

2) I don't have to do maintenance on ANYTHING related to my home.
BUT You have to fix everything yourself - paint it, repair it, or pay someone else to do it.

3) My carpets are shampooed yearly if I want it.
BUT You have to schedule & pay for it

4) When a major appliance breaks, I make a phone call and they come fix it, and I don't have to be home for it either.
BUT You have to call a repairman, schedule a house call, and take time off work to wait 4-6 hours for them to show up. AND pay for it.

5) I sleep late on Saturday morning and can lie around the house ALL WEEKEND if I want.
BUT You have to do all that crap mentioned above.

6) Ask almost any senior citizen, and they will tell you that they wish they didn't have to take care of their homes any longer... that they wish they could just rent a one-level condo and have someone else take care of those tedious details.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Bad Art

OK, I want to rattle this off before I go to bed, because I'm so annoyed and I want to get this down.

I wasted $8.75 on "One Night With the King" on Friday. Do NOT go see this film. What makes me so mad about this movie is the fact that, unlike other poorly-made, flimsy, weak films that evaporate one hour after you're finished, never to be thought on again, this film lingers in my mind. But not in a good way; no, one after another, its flaws come through my mind and make me angry all over again.

1. I love the story of Esther and King Ahasuerus. I know it by heart, and have read multiple novels about her and the historical events of the time. It is a cracking good tale. So with an adaptation of an existing story, why oh why do filmmakers feel the need to re-write the original story? Embellishment, elaboration on a theme is fine, but why change the essential points, especially if it is to a point that's NOT WORTH MAKING?

This is a tendency that I call "Lack of Faith in the Source Material," which begs the questions, "why even bother using the original story in the first place, then?" And SOOOOOO many filmmakers are guilty of it. They don't trust that the original events are entertaining enough, despite the fact that the book/story/event has been so popular or compelling that there's a pre-existing demand for a film about it! Just look at the first Narnia movie; why did they need to send the children down a frozen river in a scene they invented? And yet they cut other scenes from the book! (I know not EVERYTHING translates well to film, and I can accept those sorts of changes...)

2. Inaccurate intepretation of history really pisses me off. I did an honors thesis in college on films about the French Revolution during the 1930s, as well as a huge paper on Propaganda in Film during WWII. So I know what I'm talking about here; namely, the tendency we have to re-interpret historical events in the light of current events, political hot-button issues, and contemporary ideology.

For example, the film chose to make the Greeks into proponents of Democracy, which the villain denounced as horrible. First off - the Greeks could have cared less if democracy took hold in other nations, and I've never heard that any other nation feared its spread; if anything, they feared the armies of Greece marching in to take over! Democracy of the 5th C. BC wasn't anything like what it is in 2006. Secondly - it was just so BADLY DONE. It made no sense, and even now I'm trying to figure out what on earth they were trying to do. If there was a point or ideology they wanted to make beyond Democracy=Good, then it was so ridiculously and pointlessly convoluted that no-one in that theater would have picked up on it.

3. If you're going to make a propaganda film, then please, make it good! The only decent thing in that film was the costuming (by the inspired Bollywood designer of "Devdas," I might add). The fact that they managed to make one of my favorite Bible stories insipid, boring, and confusing just infuriates me. They can propagandize to me all they want, but by golly, they'd better make it entertaining, like "Mrs. Miniver." Now that's a delicious piece of propaganda (and I adore it and highly recommend everyone watch it. Deeply moving.)

And the love story? Utterly confusing. If you insist on inventing a love story (and there was never any mention in the Bible that Esther and Ahasuerus loved each other at all, really) then, PLEASE, make it truly romantic! Since you're inventing it from scratch anyway, then you must be very, very bad filmmakers if you can't make it compelling. And if you're going to cast 2 unknowns in the leads, then you have absolutely NO EXCUSE in casting 2 actors without an ounce of chemistry between them. There are too many gifted actors out there who can't find work. You'd find better, more charismatic pairings in high-school productions of "Oklahoma."

Oh, and Omar Sharif was really good in a cameo role, as was John Rhys Davies, and Peter O'Toole (in a "blink-and-you'll-miss-him" role). But their quality performances only stood to make the utter lack of ability in the rest of the cast (excepting the charmismatic James Callis as Haman) stand out in sharp, painful relief.

4. *whimper* It was just so BAD. And all these confusing and insulting and stupid and ridiculous aspects of the film keep zipping through my head. And that's my final point - it was Bad Art, and even worse, Bad Christian Art. If you're going to spend money on a film about a story from the Bible, or popular Christian fiction, then please - stop before you start shooting if the script sucks! I'd rather the airwaves be flooded with well-written yet smutty crap than see another bad Christian film. I find myself clinging mentally to "Shadowlands"; it's truly good and well-made. But if Christian filmmakers are going to make only lame religious films? Then I'd rather they make none at all.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Repeat Posting of "Gift vs. Need"

OK, I spent last night updating my Amazon.com WishList, because the list of Stuff I Need But Can't Afford is getting longer every month, and I'm hoping that friends & family who are contemplating presents for me for the month of December (Birthday: Dec 3; Xmas: Dec 25) will take a moment to consider these guidelines:
  1. I am a recovering packrat
  2. I live in a tiny apartment
  3. The apartment is already full of stuff

I honestly can't accommodate anything that isn't essential or highly prized. At the same time, there are always many crucial things I need, yet amazingly no one ever thinks to get them for me. Instead, I always seem to get lots of notecards... very pretty, but folks, I design my own! I have literally hundreds of notecards right now. It will take me the next DECADE to exhaust the supply.

Here's what I really need:

  1. Body work on my car - a utility pole jumped out and gouged the passenger side of my Corolla and snapped off the mirror. Frankly, it hurts to look at it.
  2. 2-4 new tires. I put a LOT of miles on my car with making house calls, and I've been skidding a lot lately on wet roads.
  3. 512 RAM for my pitiful Dell Dimension 2400. It's barely functional at present.
  4. Laptop with wireless. As I am continually on the road around Nashbrentfrank, it would be fantastically useful to be able to work on researching solutions for clients and web design when I have an hour or 2 to kill between jobs.
  5. Gift cards to Jiffy Lube, Mapco Express, Target, Publix, TJ Maxx, Sonic, Taco Bell, and The Stitchin' Post.

For all those women who get hurt when their husbands give them a blender or a new vaccuum cleaner on their anniversary, let me just say that you need to SHUT UP. I can't get a practical gift to save my life!

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Wheeeeeeee!

So the 2006 Nashville Scene "Best of Nashville" awards came out today...

And St. Bartholemew's (my church) came in 1st for "Best Church Music".

[silent, flabbergasted]

I didn't even KNOW that was a category! I don't think any of us did! I mean, I love what we do and I think our Choir Director Eric Wyse is fantastic... but I'm one of the miked singers once a month, and I'm SO mediocre! Except that I can harmonize with almost anything (but in no consistent way - I bounce back and forth between alto and tenor to the mild consternation of the pianist Tom. I can tell he's thinking "PICK ONE!") And we only run through it together on Sunday morning an hour before the 8:30 service... it makes for a very exciting 4-5 hours, since you really have to stay on your toes. Sort of like SNL.

And we don't have a full standing choir - we only have rehearsals for Easter and Christmas, but throughout the year choir members trot up to the loft at whatever service they're attending... you look up there during a service, and there's 3 miked singers, an (excellent!) bunch of instrumentalists, and anywhere from 2-10 scattered choir members. Plus it's 80% women... we can't seem to get many guys.

I called my mom to tell her, I was so excited, and she mentioned that her church had come in 1st in past years... at which point I looked at the list again, and Christ Church Cathedral? was in 2nd place. This is the gorgeous Gothic downtown Episcopal church with the fanTAStic organ, a full permanent choir that does some SERIOUSLY HARD music... and we beat them?!

We do a rather eclectic mix of music - Eric loves ancient and historic church music, but somehow manages to combine it with contemporary praise & worship stuff in a way that is so organic. He's written a melody for the Lord's Prayer that brought tears to my eyes for the first year I attended there - it's got this unbelievable build that just blows you away. And he'll write melodies for other old hymn lyrics that are such a pleasure to sing.

His way of directing us is untraditional - in charismatic-influenced churches, it's quite common to repeat choruses multiple times, and he'll form the letter "C" with his hand for us to repeat the chorus. He'll "salute" his hand in the middle of his forehead if he wants us to go back to the top of the music, or hold up his pinky if he wants us to sing the tag at the end. (Although I told him that in India, to do so means you need to go pee.) You just learn to read his signals.

Can you tell I really love it? It's something I'd been wanting to do for so many years, but having grown up at Belmont Church and spent my 20s at Christ Community, there was NO WAY I ever got to help lead worship; not that I ever tried! All of the singers were established professionals, and neither church had a choir. And in addition, St. B's will occasionally do classical pieces in Latin, etc., like the stuff I did at Hillsboro High, which I LOVE.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Oh Wikipedia!

How much do I love Wikipedia? It's the World Book of popular history; the dictionary of terms and ideas never touched on in Webster's; it's the future of information in the Information Age. I know there are errors and deliberate vandalizing upon occasion within it, but those who love the subject at hand watch over their chosen entries, and update and improve upon the material.

I was reading a particularly verbose recap of the latest Doctor Who episode on televisionwithoutpity.com (one of my favorite sites for many a year) and it was littered with references to arcane concepts and historical figures... which I could then look up on Wikipedia! I'd never heard of Steampunk, for example - an entire genre of historical/scifi/alternate universe fiction - and it's absolutely fascinating!

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Sears Silliness

For about 5+ years now, I have been a member of a small group that gets together every other month or so to watch movies, have dinner, hang out, etc. Well, Friend Paul has announced that he's moving back home (up North) in November, and so our group will be irrevokably changed.

I am very sad about this. Bad Paul! Bad, bad Paul!

So anyway, the smart lady behind cuteoverload.com had mentioned that Sears had done a really good portrait for her and her husband last year, and so when I spotted a Sears Portrait Studio flyer in my mailbox, I thought it would be massively fun to do a cheesy group photo.

And as you can see, it was!

Saturday, October 07, 2006

la voiture, c'est mal!

I am the unhappy posessor of an accursed car.

I made my initial mistake 3 years back when, as my lovely, darling little Civic hatchback was coughing up blood and on the verge of death, I unloaded it as hastily as can be done - I went to a Carmax and bought a Toyota Corolla. As all online and word-of-mouth advice praised the model highly, I swallowed my disappointment over the fact that it wasn't a Honda, and got it anyway. It was August, and the AC wasn't working in the Civic - what else could I do?

They called the color Burgundy. Yeah, right. It's Dark Red, and my opinion has been confirmed in the 3 years since, as I have gotten more speeding tickets than in all 18 years prior. It is a FACT that red cars are pulled over more than any other car by the police.

And NO, I am NOT driving any faster than I ever did before.

It's gotten so bad that I have gotten 2 tickets while going home from babysitting jobs out on Hwy 96; I have decided not to ever sit for that family again. It's just too expensive!

On top of this, my car is looking pretty battered at present. I have just now replaced 2 missing hubcaps which is a small improvement (I have never lost a hubcap before in my life, and now I lose 2 on the same car!) but the
  1. scraped rear bumper (sorry, Thomas!)
  2. gouged passenger side & broken mirror (stupid telephone pole... why'd you have to be so close to the damn street?!)
  3. gouged driver side & scraped mirror (thanks, Amy!)

are making for a rather ravaged appearance. I'm totally unable to afford to get any of it fixed; fortunately Thomas didn't make me pay for the damage done to HIS car, but the right-side damage is my own fault. I was almost relieved when Amy called me from her van as I babysat my niece:

I just hit your car...

What?

I was backing out of the garage, and I didn't see your car. Didn't you
hear it?

I ran and looked out the window - damn. And I had been wishing for WEEKS that someone would hit me so their insurance could pay for the damage... but it was on the WRONG SIDE.

Yes, this car is accursed.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Precious Moments

NOT THE FIGURINES. No nononononono.

No, I mean those rare, delightful moments when all is well... like right now.
  1. The nasty work project I've been doing for the last week is done
  2. It's Friday
  3. I have lunch with a friend in 10 minutes
  4. I have one job this afternoon that's paying doubletime
  5. The 3rd episode of Doctor Who is on this evening
  6. Did I mention I get to leave in 6 minutes?

Feel that? That's happy.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Randomizer

  1. I had FIVE different jobs yesterday; what's up with that?! Am very tired now and want to go home and take a nap, but cannot as I have three jobs today. Two to go, and they're both difficult.
  2. Watched the season finale of Eureka this morning, and cried throughout. In a good way. Really excellent, excellent story/acting/etc. Very moving.
  3. It is impossible to be melancholy while watching Dancing With the Stars.
  4. Doing work that is automatically inaccurate is depressing. Especially when the person you're doing the work for wants it that way, and doesn't mind the fact that it's incorrect.
  5. I got replacement hubcaps for the 2 that have been missing lo these many months. I feel as though one tiny part of my life is much improved.
  6. I wish I had a new Yaris.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Stitching as a Metaphor

I've always enjoyed doing cross-stitch (and most of the ladies who attend the Crafting Bee are stitchers as well) but ever since I've started these monthly Bees, I keep finding analogies to Life in the work we're doing.  The latest example of this is dealing with mistakes.  Cross-Stitch is basically grid work, akin to paint-by-numbers; you have a pattern on a piece of paper that you are constantly looking at to make sure that you're stitching in the correct squares with the designated color on your linen.  You count and recount the number of threads, and then usually you count them again.
 
But even the most meticulous stitcher makes mistakes, and when you finally discover them, you have a difficult choice in front of you; should you unpick your stitches all the way back to the original error and re-do it, or is the problem something that won't destroy the integrity of the piece if you leave it as it is?  Cross-stitching builds upon itself - for example, if you have a row of flowers that is 2 stitches off, it can throw off everything else in the piece because you count threads from one completed section to find the starting point for the next section.  Plus, the longer it takes you to discover that you've miscounted, the more difficult and time-consuming it is to fix the problem.
 
If you choose to re-do your work, it's painful to lose all those completed stitches, and it seems to take forever, but there's the sense of relief that it will eventually be corrected.  The holes in the warp and weft of the linen get stretched out and the fabric looks a bit battered & misshapen, but ultimately everything will line up the way it's supposed to.
 
If you choose not to re-do your work, but try and adapt the pattern to accommodate the mistake, it's certainly easier, but you have to live with the knowledge that the piece is now flawed.  No-one else may notice it, but you will always know.  It's a humbling experience, and many experienced stitchers who do lovely, elaborate work will tell you at that point that it's good for you; they've done the same thing themselves.  There's an oft-repeated story among stitchers that in Olden Times, women working on quilts or samplers or embroidered pieces would deliberately make a mistake... because "only God is perfect."
 
As I've made more and more projects over the years, from tiny, 4-inch square birth announcements to a 5 foot historic Tennessee reproduction sampler (which I'm STILL not finished with) I've made more mistakes, and each time I have to decide - start over, or live with it?  Fortunately in this community of creative women, there is encouragement to be had with either decision - empathy, useful advice, even communal mourning over the lost hours of work that will have to be destroyed.  We will commiserate together, vent our frustration over the damage done... and then go back to work.

Monday, October 02, 2006

So Very Sad

OK, I am losing heart over Saturday Night Live - I just watched the season premiere, and the only really funny thing in the entire show was Brian Williams' cameo. He was also the best PERFORMER in the show. And he's a news anchor, not even a cast member!

Sad, sad, sad.

Exodus

What is the deal with people? I've just had another friend announce he's moving away in early November; that'll be the 5th one in the last few months. I'm beginning to feel abandoned.

Is it Nashville? Speaking for the city: Did we do something wrong? Is it the traffic? Look, I know the roads can be a bit hinky, especially around 40E, and Briley Pkwy... really, we're gonna get that finished up soon, I promise!

Is it the weather? I mean, I know it was a really nasty, humid summer, but no worse that usual... and the fall is turning out to be fantastic; why would you want to leave now? And we cut back on the cicadas this summer...

Is it something we said? Is it the fact that we have a predominently religious population with a church on every corner and we tend to pray in restaurants? That we don't have a Nordstrom's?

This is the story of my life... NOBODY seems to stay here. Every few years there seems to be a mass exodus of friends, and folks, I am TIRED of it! So no more leaving! No more friends are allowed to leave Nashville - I absolutely forbid it! Rachel, if you want to go to New York and work on your acting career, you're gonna have to do it without my knowing because so help me, I will SABOTAGE your efforts to leave the city!

You have been warned!